New World's Worth
by Hota
Summary: Sequel to Omedetou. Daisuke is content with his life with Riku, but something has always been missing. Then Satoshi returns after a ten year absence without even a notice. Much angst, heartache, and turmoil to follow. WIP
1. Chapter 1 World Shaker

**Warnings: **Angst. And fluff. And set many years after the prequel "Omedetou." Yes, this was previously chapter two, but for various reasons, I've decided to upload it as a new WIP, and was just waiting to do so until I had the next chapter ready to upload to make the change.

**AN: **I really have no clue where I was going with "Omedetou" previously, but when I was reading through it again, this just came to me. I have a soft spot for exploration of these muses set years after the cannon, and as I've yet to write them past the 'hey we're young and attracted to each other' phase with the chaos of Dark and Krad around, I figured it was high time to try my hand at it.

That being said, this is written for me and my Satoshi-muse, who is every bit of an angst-whore that I am. It will not be a pretty fic, hell it may get downright ugly, but it will be a hell of a lot more real than a lot of other things I've written in this fandom. It will have all the angst and turmoil of lost chances and what-ifs and probably not a very happy ending, (though who knows) so if you can't handle that, I suggest you not read further. And for those who can, enjoy.

* * *

**New World's Worth: Chapter One  
World Shaker**

He shouldn't have been surprised when Satoshi was gone the next day. He should have realized that kiss meant more than just Happy Birthday – Satoshi was all but genetically incapable of doing anything without going out with a bang. That didn't make it hurt any less. Not even a goodbye this time, although… maybe that's what the whole… 'incident' in the art room had been. He flushed at the thought, burying his face in an arm on his desk with a groan. His body felt warm just remembering it. Which was… wrong, wasn't it? Riku made him feel warm too, in different ways, but she should have made his whole body hot like Satoshi had. Right? What was wrong with him?

Nothing! He loved Riku, and that was that.

It would be years before he realized he loved her because she was comfortable, years before he matured enough to even know what that really meant. And by then it would be too late. Satoshi would be gone – not that he hadn't searched, he had. And he was good – good enough to find a trace here or there every few months. But Satoshi was better, especially when he didn't want to be found. And so the times he looked grew further and further between, until it was months, and then a year between each search, because the ache in his chest grew every time he walked away empty-handed.

He went to college, got a degree in both Art History and teaching. He married Riku, and since neither Dark nor Satoshi was there, Saehara was his best man, and it was the happiest day of his life despite the pang of longing. He discovered sex, and the horror-filled consequences of hormonal pregnant women, and the miracle of child-birth.

And he was happy and content and had accepted that he couldn't have everything he wanted.

So when Satoshi entered his life again, it shook his world.

* * *

Daisuke sat in the driver's seat, one hand on the wheel and the other resting comfortably against Riku's. Even after all this time, it was the little things that put him a smile in his heart.

"Ice cream?" five-year old Sakura asked from the backseat.

Riku laughed, shifting to look back at their daughter. "Yes, sweetie. You've been very good today. Did you enjoy the beach?"

"Yes!" Sakura grinned and threw her hands up. "Daddy, can I ride on your shoulders again?"

"I think you broke Daddy's shoulders." Daisuke glanced back in the rear-view to find a look of shock forming on Sakura's face. He was about to say he was kidding when Riku beat him to it, landing a punch on his arm with her free hand.

"Daddy's teasing, sweetie."

"Oh." Sakura contemplated that a moment before grinning again. "Ice cream!"

Daisuke shook his head with a smile and glanced at Riku. "She reminds me of someone."

"If you say me when I was pregnant, you'll be sleeping on the couch," Riku said, somehow managing to glare and smile sweetly at once. Girls. He still didn't understand them, and according to his father no man did. Somehow that wasn't comforting.

He wisely kept his mouth shut and the drive continued with Sakura singing in the backseat.

"Hey, what's that?" Riku leaned forward to look at a tall building where there had only been empty land a month before. "_Hiwatari Security Solutions_. Hiwatari? That sounds familiar…"

Daisuke's heart stopped and it was suddenly impossible to breathe. The car swerved as everything disappeared aside from the sight of that name on the sign. Hiwatari? A shock of memory of an art room and his cherished paintbrushes and one of the most confusing moments of his life crashed over him. Unique blue hair and eyes that never smiled, eyes that held far more pain and darkness than anyone's ever should, let alone a fourteen year old kid. Car horns blaring were enough to snap him out of it and he jerked the car back on track.

"Honey? Are you alright?"

No way. It couldn't be him, it just couldn't. Surely he would have said hi or something? It'd been… Gods, it'd been so long. Ten years now?

"Daisuke! What's wrong? You're pale." Riku looked at him in concern, reaching up to press the back of her hand against his cheek.

"What? No, I'm fine. It's just… We went to school with a Hiwatari, remember?" He glanced at her in time to see a shadow pass behind her eyes before she smiled.

"Oh yeah. Satoshi. You think it's him?"

Daisuke shrugged and glanced in the mirror to catch another glimpse of the sign before pulling into the ice cream parlor a block away. "It might be. It certainly sounds like something he'd do, making his own business for security." He smiled and shook his head as all the traps Satoshi had set came back to him. He'd certainly given Dark a run for his money.

"Do you want to go see?"

Before he could answer, Sakura was out of her seat and climbing between them. "Ice cream!"

Daisuke laughed and pulled her into his lap. "Okay, okay. Like you need any sugar."

"But it's yummy!"

"You're yummy. How about I just eat you?" he said, lifting her up to blow raspberries on her stomach, causing her to squeal and giggle.

Riku climbed out and moved around to Daisuke's door to pull it open. "Okay, give me my daughter you fiend," she said with a laugh. "Come on, Miss Pumpkin Bikini. Strawberry ice cream?"

Sakura wound her arms around Riku's neck and stuck her tongue out at Daisuke. "No, sakura flavor!"

"I don't know, have you been good enough?" Daisuke stood and locked the car behind them.

"Yes," she said, giving him such innocent, scarlet-flecked brown puppy eyes they should have required a license.

He felt his insides melt completely and ignored Riku's snickered "Sucker" as he ordered two scoops of sakura ice cream. They sat near a window and his eyes instinctively looked for the sign, just visible behind a tree and taunting him like a ghost.

"Daisuke? Do you want to go see if it's Hiwatari?"

Daisuke sighed and glanced at Riku, hesitating before nodding. If he didn't find out, it would eat him alive. "If you don't mind stopping on the way back." He picked up a spoon and stole a bite of Sakura's ice cream, the cool sweetness of it heaven after being in the sun all day.

"Oh, Emiko called earlier. She wanted to know if we're still having dinner with them Friday."

"Yeah, I can bring home whatever I don't get graded. Seven right?"

"We're going to see gramma and grampa?" Sakura looked up and completely missed her mouth with the spoon, smearing pink ice cream all over her cheek.

Riku sighed fondly and grabbed some napkins. "Yes, we're going to see grandma and grandpa."

"Yay! I love gramma and grampa's house!"

"That's because she's never tried to kill you with it," Daisuke said under his breath.

Riku slanted a look at him as she wiped Sakura's face. "Come on, it wasn't that bad."

Daisuke snorted, propping his chin on his hand. He'd told Riku a lot of things once Dark was gone, and more when they were engaged, because she had a right to know what kind of family she was marrying into. "Believe me, some days I thought she was really trying to kill me." Thankfully, as soon as _Kokuyoku _was sealed, the 'training' stopped. That wasn't to say she hadn't still tested him from time to time, when she thought he was losing his touch. Even now he still kept in shape, just in case, and because it had been beaten into his head from a young age to never be idle unless sleeping.

"Emiko loves you too much for that."

"Ha. Just be glad we had a daughter." He smiled as he watched Sakura finish her dessert, gradually listing towards Riku as exhaustion started setting in. "I think it's time for someone's nap."

"No, not tired," Sakura said around a yawn.

Riku hefted Sakura up and they piled back into the car.

"You don't mind if we stop?" he asked. When she shook her head, he smiled and leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Love you."

It only took five minutes to change parking lots, and then he was walking into the tall, mostly glass building. _Please let it be Hiwatari-kun. Please. I have to know he's okay._ Guilt filled his chest for not finding Satoshi sooner. If Satoshi had formed his own business, he should have known about it! When had he stopped looking? Around… the time of the Riku's pregnancy? Because Satoshi hadn't been there. He'd never been there, not for graduation, from high-school or college, or his marriage. Why would he be there for the birth of Daisuke's daughter? And it killed him that that was his excuse.

The air inside was cool, almost enough to be chilly, and he welcomed the shock of it to bury his thoughts. He spotted the front desk with a young lady behind it and made his way to it. "Excuse me."

She looked up with a polite smile. "Yes, how may I help you?"

"Can you tell me who owns this place? Is his name Satoshi?"

"Pardon?"

"The Hiwatari on the sign. Is his name Satoshi?" He couldn't help that he was sounding just a bit desperate; it wasn't every day an old friend – no, more than friend – just potentially happened back into your life.

Before the flustered woman could answer, another stepped up to the desk, this one blonde and looking every bit as foreign as she sounded. "Yes, Mister Satoshi Hiwatari is owner of this business. Who are you?" Her accent was thick, not English or anything he recognized, something much thicker and throatier.

Daisuke's heart skipped a few beats. "Satoshi… Is he here? I need to speak with him. Please. I'm an old friend."

The look she gave him was one of thinly veiled distaste. He knew how he must look – unruly red hair, loud Hawaiian shirt over a white tank, swimming trunks, sandals. It was the price of being a father and one he paid willingly – he couldn't care less what she thought of him. "I am sorry, Mister Hiwatari is in meeting. He is not to be disturbed."

He'd never been one for violence, but he suddenly found himself wanting to claw her eyes out. He swallowed a scream and took a few slow, deep breaths. "When will he be available?"

"I am not sure. It is very important meeting."

"Okay…" No it wasn't okay! He needed to see Satoshi, to tell him… ask him so many things. But Satoshi had a life, and was doing quite well for himself it looked like. He'd have to just… be patient. "Okay. Can you please give him a message? Tell him Daisuke was here and that he can reach me at this number." He picked up a pen and one of the cards on the desk, flipping it over to write his number and handing it over.

She looked at it as though it was against her religion to touch it, but she finally took it, tucking it into the black folder she was holding. "I will see to it."

"Thank you." He relaxed slightly and looked around. "And tell him… Tell him I said welcome home." He smiled and turned to leave with a sigh, wanting to wait around, but he couldn't keep Riku waiting. He had what he'd come for at any rate.

Satoshi was back.


	2. Chapter 2 World Forsaker

**New World's Worth: Chapter Two  
World Forsaker**

"It's also designed with pivotal lasers and cameras that continuously scan the area, offering a wider range of coverage." The young man presenting sounded entirely pleased and looked smug as he sat down.

Satoshi wasn't impressed and continued flipping through the portfolio as he paced. He finally stopped in front of the window, turning his attention to the city. It hadn't changed much from what he remembered – even the people looked the same. An additional building here or there, a few different names or signs, but the layout was something that would likely never change. The sea was just visible at the horizon, though if he went to the top floor he'd be able to see it more clearly. He was about to turn back to the others when his eyes were drawn to someone walking out of the building, the red hair familiar against the outrageous clothing.

Daisuke. He knew instinctively it was him; his body reacted the same way it had years ago, his heart pounding and making him just a tad bit breathless. And the longing was enough he ached. The only thing different was the lack of pain caused by Krad trying to claw his way out. And without that pain, the near unnatural response of his body was almost overwhelming. Without anything to focus on or fight against, he couldn't do anything but feel, and that was something he didn't do well.

It was enough to let him know he was, in a word, screwed.

"Sir?"

Satoshi sighed as he realized the room had gotten quiet as they waited for his response. "Toys," he said, turning to face them. He watched the confusion that passed over their faces before continuing. "You're giving me nothing but toys. Pivotal lasers and cameras? Those aren't new, they're not used because they're unreliable. I asked for software, gentlemen, not these sup-par gadgets." He waved the portfolio around to emphasize his words before tossing it to the table. "Now, develop software that can reliably convert the output from these – video, audio, heat, pressure, the whole nine yards – and you may be on to something. Until then, I better not see you in my office again."

He turned back to the window in dismissal and listened as the silence was slowly replaced by the sounds of them leaving. Once the door closed, he rubbed at his eyes, no longer hidden behind glasses. He'd discovered he could look a hell of a lot more intimidating without them.

The door opened again as he was pouring a glass of water. Sonya, right on time. "Daisuke came by?" he asked, the brief pause in footsteps confirming what he already knew. He took a few sips of water before turning to face his secretary of five years.

"Yes, he wanted to see you. He gave his number and said… tell you 'welcome home.'" Her nose wrinkled a bit as she added in English, "His clothes were horrifying."

Satoshi's mind was still stuck on "he wanted to see you." He'd been here barely a week and already Daisuke had tracked him down. Or more likely, had happened by the building. He wasn't prepared to deal with Daisuke yet, but he knew Daisuke wouldn't give up either. And really, how could he prepare for facing him again after so long?

"Set up a meeting," he said, switching to English as well.

"Sir?" Sonya looked truly surprised, but he couldn't blame her. It wasn't every day he agreed to meet someone, let alone privately.

"I'm free on Friday. Around four, at the sushi restaurant near the University."

Sonya opened up the folder she carried and set it on the table to find the day, scribbling in the appointment. "Shall I schedule the car for you then?"

"I'll drive myself." She scribbled more notes that he knew he'd never be able to decipher. Give him a computer code and he'd break it in twenty minutes, but for the life of him he couldn't read Sonya's shorthand. Not that it mattered. She'd proven just how capable she was over the years.

"Takahashi called and is interested in a meeting." She pulled out a small pile of notes from the calls she'd taken. It took five minutes to go through them all – partners accepting deals and offers, clients asking for a piece of the pie, though in far too many words. Most of them could rot in Hell for all he cared. If they hadn't supported him from the beginning, they weren't getting anything. Forty million annually was a lot, but it didn't take much to shrink it.

By the time they were finished, his week was full, though he'd left all of Friday afternoon and evening free. He wasn't sure what to expect from his meeting with Daisuke, but somehow he knew he would need it.

Done for the day, he returned home to an apartment much larger than the one he'd had ten years ago – it wouldn't do to look like he had to save money. He didn't need the space, but it was comfortable for the times he actually used it. It didn't lack for anything – top floor, master bedroom, balcony with a view to die for, and a bathroom that would make any woman green with envy.

He shed his suit jacket as soon as he was inside, the expensive material hardly making a sound as he tossed it over the back of a chair. Dinner tonight was a thick beef stew, kept warm in a pot on the stove. Sonya had convinced his cook to come to Japan and for that he was grateful. He may have gotten better at taking care of himself, but making a sensible meal was still beyond him. He turned the TV onto the local news for background noise and took his computer off idle as he sat down with his meal.

The additional information he'd been collecting on Daisuke was finished and he skimmed over it. He hadn't stopped keeping tabs on the redhead, not even when he'd married or had a kid, even if common sense told him to. Daisuke was a part of a past he couldn't have let go of even when he'd wanted to. When someone saved your life in more ways than one, it was impossible to forget them, but it was also impossible to think of Daisuke without the fleeting fear and panic that Krad would wake up inside him again. He knew Krad was sealed, just as he knew that gravity was a law, but when you were falling, it wasn't really the first thing you thought about. Still, he'd learned to take the good when it came, because it made the bad more tolerable, and out of everything that had happened in his life, he could honestly say Daisuke had been the best.

So he'd continued keeping tabs, written hundreds of letters and bought a dozen birthday cards that had never seen an envelope much less the mailbox, and he'd continued with his life, such as it was.

He'd never married, but had a dozen companions because it was expected of him, though he'd slept with only a handful – all of them redheads.

Part of him had hoped he wouldn't have to see Daisuke again, had hoped Daisuke would forget about him, while another part dreaded it. What was there to say after a decade that would mean anything anymore? Dark and Krad… the memory of them was like a bad nightmare, every moment painful in its clarity. And the frightening part was… he'd live through it all again, every horrifying, mind-numbing, excruciating moment, so long as it meant Daisuke would be happy in the end. Because the smallest part of him, the part he couldn't let grow for fear of it breaking him, was _happy_ Daisuke remembered, that Daisuke wanted to see him enough he'd walked into one of the most expensive corporations in the city wearing a Hawaiian shirt and sandals.

It was enough he almost smiled.

He finished his dinner, put the leftovers in the fridge, and got ready for bed. He'd gotten used to early nights and early mornings, with barely any time to breathe, but Sonya had a strict rule about him being out of the office and away from work by seven or eight. It used to eat at him, leaving unfinished work just to go home and sleep and come right back to it, but finally, a year into his business, he'd promised to go two weeks of doing things her way, and he'd never gone back. Even just a few hours a night he could count on having away from work had done wonders for his health.

He methodically removed his clothes and tossed them to the hamper, enjoying a quick, hot shower before sliding into bed. Usually, he didn't dream, but he wasn't surprised in the least when he fell asleep to dreams of Daisuke – of when they were in school, of trying to capture Dark, of those few stolen moments between Krad sleeping and waking in a rage. And strangely enough, he woke refreshed. At peace. The past may have been mostly dark, a living Hell of pain and possession, but he'd always known his goals, even if Daisuke had kept him from them. He'd been desperate, grasping for anything that would just make everything _end_, but Daisuke had found an alternate path that kept them both alive.

He owed Daisuke, more than he'd ever be able to admit to, and he felt like an utter ass for disappearing from Daisuke's life, but he'd honestly never expected to return. He'd wanted to, had almost come back for the wedding, but at the last minute couldn't bring himself to get on the plane. And when their child was born, well, that had pretty much sealed his conviction that he would only be an unwanted distraction in Daisuke's life. He wanted more than Daisuke could give, and while Daisuke could be dense and naïve at times, they were old enough now he surely would pick up on that.

He sighed and climbed out of bed, dressing as the scent of breakfast and coffee drifted into the bedroom. Friday and Daisuke could wait, he had more important things to focus on for the moment, but he knew it was still going to be a long week.


	3. Chapter 3 Buried Past

**New World's Worth - Chapter Three  
Buried Past**

"Yes. Yes, of course I'll be there." Daisuke hung up the phone and sank into a chair in shock.

"Who was that?" Riku asked from across the table. She finished her breakfast with one hand and caught Sakura's thrown tipsy cup with the other.

"Hiwatari's secretary. He said he'll meet me on Friday." Daisuke laughed softly and could hardly believe it. He'd expected to have to track down where Satoshi was staying and break in. A willing meeting? And so soon!

"Friday? Do we need to cancel with your parents?"

Daisuke rubbed a thumb along his lips absently, glancing up at the question. "What? No, no, he wants to meet at four. I can… let my last class out early and still be there by seven. You're going over around noon right?"

"Emiko wants to buy her new dresses." Riku shook her head with a roll of her eyes. "You know I love your mother, but is she ever going to stop?"

Daisuke snickered into his coffee. "What are grandmothers for?" He stood and leaned over to kiss Riku's cheek. "I need to get going. See you tonight."

Riku reached up to smooth his hair though it was a vain attempt – it was as unruly as ever, though the longer length at least kept it looking decent. "Don't forget your lunch."

"Got it." Daisuke grabbed the bento, silently giving thanks Riku was a far better cook than Risa, though it didn't keep him from buying lunch at a nearby café from time to time. He slipped it into his bag on his way out. The drive to the University took fifteen minutes and another five to get to his classroom on the third floor, during which he went over in his head all the things he wanted to ask Satoshi and couldn't. Not yet at least. His mouth ran away from him at times, but he knew better than to start asking such bitter questions the first time they came face to face after so long. Ten years. _Ten _years. How had time gone by so fast? It only made things worse that, now that he knew Satoshi was alive and _here, _he could feel that dull ache in his chest more keenly than ever, right next to where the ache of losing Dark was.

His first class was an advanced art class and a few of his students were already setting up. It was his only non-lecture class and he settled at the desk to complete the upcoming test for his Art History class on Wednesday. The students would let him know if they needed anything and he didn't require much other than they complete their chosen projects by the deadline, with sufficient effort applied, of course.

As he sat, the cool chain of his necklace shifted against his skin and he pulled it from beneath his shirt, fingering the tiny black feather pendant. One of Dark's feathers, preserved with a sealing spell before it had shrunk and disappeared completely. Finding Satoshi again had made him nostalgic and he'd dug it out of his drawer where it had been the past few years. Now that Sakura was past her grab-and-chew stage, he'd start wearing it again.

Strange how finding Satoshi caused the anguish from losing Dark to swamp him again, when he'd been able to push it to the back of his mind until now. There was no way to fill that kind of void, no one in the world who could replace that relationship. It still hurt just as sharply as if they'd been separated yesterday; it was just easier not to dwell on. It was a wound time would never heal.

All day his background thoughts drifted between memories and anticipation of Friday. By the time his two-hour lull between classes came, he realized he'd flipped to a blank page in his notebook and sketched Satoshi's face. So much for getting work done. He sighed and studied the picture. It wasn't Satoshi how he remembered him, not quite. He'd drawn Satoshi how he imagined he looked now – not quite as malnourish-thin, face a little leaner from his body catching up with his mind. But the eyes and hair were the same, because nothing could ever really erase what Krad had done to him or what he'd suffered through for so long, and Satoshi was far too stubborn and uncaring to bother changing his hair.

He smiled faintly and pushed the notebook aside, moving on to more immediate concerns. The anticipation would kill him, but his students needed his mind present for the lectures.

Friday came all too quickly and not soon enough. Daisuke didn't sleep a wink the night before and woke up with butterflies in his stomach. He'd been tempted to call in sick, but he knew not having anything to do would only make things worse. So he went to work and managed to focus enough the day didn't drag, though he still found himself watching the clock.

Finally four o'clock rolled around and the butterflies returned with a vengeance. He picked up the papers needing graded by Monday and closed up his office. His hands felt cold and clammy and shook on the steering wheel as he drove. He stared at the restaurant after parking, heart pounding in his chest. Satoshi was… right inside there, or would be soon. Now that the moment was upon him he couldn't for the life of him figure out what he should do or say. It'd been so long. What if Satoshi only wanted to meet him to tell him not to be a bother anymore? They weren't fourteen anymore, he wasn't so naïve to think that just by forcing his friendship on Satoshi it would keep him around. No, but he was still stubborn when it came to chipping away at the shell Satoshi tried to keep around himself. Or had tried to keep. He wasn't sure what to expect now.

And he wasn't going to find out sitting in his car. He took a deep breath and got out.

When he stepped into the restaurant, his eyes were immediately drawn to a very familiar shade of blue hair. "Satoshi…" His chest hurt with the force of his heart's beating, unable to breathe as he stumbled forward. "Hiwatari-kun," he said, the name slipping from his lips with ease. When Satoshi stood to greet him, he didn't even take in the business suit or the fact Satoshi was half a foot taller than him. He didn't stop moving until he had his arms around the other male and was hugging him tight. "You're alive."

"Of course I'm alive."

Daisuke laughed and struggled to breathe through the relief, anger, pain, and hurt, not sure which was stronger until he realized Satoshi was just standing there. He flushed in embarrassment and quickly let go, rubbing at his chest before punching Satoshi's arm. "What do you mean of course? You disappeared. You could have died years ago for all I knew!"

Satoshi smoothed a hand over his suit and retook his seat. "You would have known."

Daisuke could only stare in silence, at a loss at the simple answer. Satoshi… hadn't always been this cold, had he? He sat carefully, dozens of questions flicking through his head. Where to start? _Where have you been? Why did you disappear? Why weren't you at my wedding?_ "I have a daughter now." Well, that certainly hadn't been anywhere near what he'd wanted to say.

"I know."

Daisuke looked up sharply. "What?"

Satoshi sighed, fingers resting around a glass of water. "I've been keeping track."

"Of course you have." Daisuke didn't bother trying to hide the bitterness. "So you've kept tabs on me ever since you left and I know nothing about you. You could have at least sent a letter once in a while. Picked up a phone." He met Satoshi's eyes with an accusing look and was shocked to see… nothing. He'd always thought the glasses were a shield, but Satoshi sure as hell didn't need them now. His eyes were the same unique shade of blue, but they were colder. Harder. It may have still been Satoshi behind them, but he'd built so many more barriers around himself it was a wonder he didn't suffocate. "What happened to you?"

Satoshi shrugged. "Life. I grew up."

"You were already grown up."

"Being a genius doesn't mean I was grown up, Niwa. I thought life would get easier once…" He trailed off and looked away. He didn't have to finish, they both knew what he meant. The sealing should have solved all their problems. "It only got harder."

Daisuke shook his head, unable to imagine how it could have gotten worse than having Krad inside. "Why did you leave?" It might have just been his imagination, but he thought he saw a shift in Satoshi's eyes, a weakening of the barriers.

"I had my answer. There was no reason to stay."

"What's that supposed to mean? Answer to what?" Daisuke suspected he knew what, had always known, but he couldn't quite wrap his head around it without some kind of confirmation first.

"When I said goodbye-"

"You never said goodbye," Daisuke said, voice sharp and bitter, but he quickly shut his mouth when Satoshi gave him a piercing look.

"The last time I saw you, I would have stayed." Satoshi didn't explain further, falling silent as he watched Daisuke.

Daisuke shook his head with a confused, helpless look. "Then why didn't you?"

Satoshi lifted a shoulder and glanced away again. "You didn't want me to."

Anger swelled up inside Daisuke and he slammed a hand on the table, causing the silverware to clink. "I never told you to leave! Never! How-" _How dare you! _He bit his tongue and curled his hands tighter.

"You didn't ask me to stay either. You were with Riku. You still are."

Both fists hit the table this time and Daisuke found himself on his feet. "Drop the act! We were kids – how the hell was I supposed to read your mind? You didn't even say anything, you just…" He trailed off and felt his face heating as the memory came back, much more intense and clear with Satoshi sitting right in front of him. The warmth of Satoshi's hands, the confusion and the sensation of drowning in something he'd never be able to control. Satoshi may look calm on the outside, but inside he was as wild and dangerous as a fire, and it was contagious. "You just dropped a bomb on me and disappeared. What was I supposed to do? By the time I got my senses back, you were long gone." He dropped back into his seat with a sigh, burying his hands in his hair and rubbing the heels of them against his eyes. "You never had any intention of staying. That _was_ your goodbye." He'd had ten long years to come to that conclusion, but he'd only needed a week. Satoshi only said goodbye when he planned on coming back.

Satoshi was silent for a long moment before speaking. "I didn't want to come between you and Riku."

"God, I'm so _sick_ of people doing what they think is best for me." He rubbed harder at his eyes and sat back with a pensive, curious look as a platter of sushi was brought over to them. He could see the question in Satoshi's eyes about that outburst, though he wouldn't let him voice it. Before the waitress was completely out of earshot, he said, "So you left because you were scared. Why come back now?"

Satoshi scowled, the expression faint, but Daisuke still saw it. "Business. We're expanding, this was the next logical place to do so."

"Oh." Daisuke hadn't really expected to be part of the reason Satoshi came back, but it would have been nice. He couldn't explain why that answer disappointed him so much and knew better than to try. "Will you be staying long?"

"Long enough. We're based in America, I'll need to be back in a month or so to look over things." He motioned for Daisuke to help himself to the sushi and filled a cup of hot green tea.

"You mean you have to breathe down their necks so they get the job done." Daisuke smiled faintly and could just see Satoshi as owner of his own business. He'd done well enough as Commander, he could only imagine what Satoshi was like with complete authority.

A smirk flicked across Satoshi's lips and it was almost the same expression Daisuke had seen through Dark's eyes – that touch of arrogance behind the confidence. "Something like that."

They ate in silence for a bit, and Daisuke couldn't help watching Satoshi through his bangs. He looked close to how he'd imagined: face and body filled out, healthier, handsome in a way that made you have to look twice. And that darkness, the "knowledge" of things no one should ever have to experience, was still there, sharp as ever.

"You stopped wearing your glasses."

"I didn't need them."

Daisuke nodded and mentally translated the silent "anymore" on the end. Satoshi may have never needed them for his eyesight, but they'd still served a purpose. The fact he'd given them up completely was just further testament to the additional barriers he'd have to break through.

It was on the tip of his tongue to ask so many things – did Satoshi still feel… _that way_ about him? Why had he not at least sent a letter all those years? Why hadn't he been there on some of the most important days of his life? But he choked them back; swallowed them down and drowned them in hot tea. Maybe one day, if Satoshi became more than a living ghost in his life, he'd be able to ask. "So, you've been doing well?" he asked instead, mentally slapping himself for being so mundane. "You look…healthier."

Satoshi smirked again, giving Daisuke a look somewhere between amused and exasperated. "I have a cook who makes sure I have at least two decent meals a day."

"Wow, personal cook? Must be living the big life now." Daisuke grinned and snagged another piece of sushi. "Fancy car, nice house? Foreign girlfriend?" That last one made his heart skip a beat as he found he didn't really want to know if the answer was yes. Why couldn't he have just kept his mouth shut?

Satoshi paused with his chopsticks hovering around a piece of sushi, glancing at Daisuke like he knew what was going through his head. Daisuke wouldn't be surprised if he really did. "Expensive car, large apartment. No relationship."

Daisuke relaxed ever so slightly and then ducked his head as guilt flooded him. Here he was happily married and daring to feel… jealous if Satoshi had the same. He told himself it was more from the chance of Satoshi finding someone who wasn't worthy, knowing it was a lie, but it didn't keep him from using it as an excuse. "So nothing to keep you from coming over for dinner sometime."

"Sure that's such a good idea?"

"Why wouldn't it be? You're an old friend, and Riku likes to cook for others. Mom's been giving her recipes." Daisuke shook his head and couldn't stop the fond smile, grateful Riku got along with his family so well – gods knew they could be a handful. "Besides, we need to catch up."

"Isn't that what we're doing?"

"No, we're making polite, mundane conversation because we're in public and you're likely going to bolt as soon as you're done eating." Daisuke rolled his eyes and propped his chin up, absently mixing a bit more wasabi into his soy sauce.

Satoshi shrugged and didn't try to deny it. "I'll look at my schedule."

Daisuke snorted and snagged the last of the eel. "You better at least give me a call once in a while. You pull another disappearing act and I'm hunting you down. I know where to look this time." It wasn't an idle threat at all and they both knew his greatest weapon was his stubbornness without Dark around. Now that he knew Satoshi was alive, he wasn't about to let him up and vanish again. "So, dinner at our place next week. It's a holiday. I'm not taking no for an answer."

"Niwa."

"Hiwatari-kun." They stared at each other in silence, and Daisuke refused to back down on this. He couldn't help the grin when he heard Satoshi sigh in defeat a few moments later. "Great. I'll see you at seven then. Something tells me you already have my address." He smiled faintly and finished his tea. "Thank you for lunch. I need to get going, supposed to be at Mom's soon." He stood and paused to just look at Satoshi a long moment. "It's good to see you again."

Satoshi nodded. "It's been too long."

Daisuke stared, torn between dumping water on Satoshi's head or hugging him. Neither were really appropriate. "Just make sure it's not that long again. I'll drag you out of your office if you try to hide on Thursday."

"I'll be there." He didn't sound too happy about it, but it was a win as far as Daisuke was concerned. He left feeling like he was on Cloud 9 and couldn't wait until Thursday. He just prayed Riku wouldn't try to beat him up for not running it by her first.


	4. Chapter 4 Family

New chapter. Sorry for the shortness and delay. Luckily I've been sick with a fever, which seems to have given me a writing bug. Next chapter shouldn't be more than a week, but no promises.

Please read and review :)

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**New World's Worth: Chapter Four  
Family**

Home smelled like gingersnap cookies. Emiko loved to cook and most of the time, chances were it was a dessert, but no matter what she baked the air always had a touch of warm gingersnap scent.

Daisuke stepped inside, breathing deeply and side-stepping where the pitfall had always been out of sheer survival instinct. It'd been deactivated years before, but old habits die hard.

"Welcome home, Daisuke." Kosuke propped against the wall, holding out a cup of steaming green tea.

Daisuke smiled, setting his bag in the hall and slipping off his shoes before taking the cup. "Thanks."

"Long day?" Kosuke asked, moving into the living room to sit on the couch. He turned off the TV and refilled his own cup.

Something about the question made Daisuke think Riku had mentioned Satoshi, though it was hard to be sure when it was his father asking. "Not too long," he replied, sinking into the chair Daiki had always used. He'd passed away a few years before, peacefully in his sleep, though he'd at least been able to see the first year of Sakura's life.

"Eventful?"

Daisuke looked at his father, exasperated. "I met with Hiwatari-kun."

"Oh? I thought he was in America. How's he doing?"

He nearly spit green tea across the room at the nonchalant response. "You knew?"

Kosuke nodded and flicked his fingers at the TV. "There was some news report on him a while back. Apparently his company is one of the fastest-growing around the world."

Daisuke stared at his father in disbelief. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Kosuke tilted his head. "You never asked for help. And I didn't think you were looking anymore."

The knowledge that Kosuke _knew _he'd been looking for Satoshi caused his face to heat, embarrassed and angry at once. He'd known, probably since day one. Daisuke had been desperate at first and hadn't really tried to hide it, but he'd been a kid who'd just lost the only other person in the world who could even come close to understanding. Granted, their experiences as Tamers were like night and day, but they'd still been connected. He'd thought that connection would always be there. And then it was gone. Just like that. All because he'd been an innocent, confused kid.

"Daddy!" Sakura came barreling down the stairs, smears of paint all over her hands and arms.

"I see someone let you make a mess." Daisuke laughed as Kosuke caught her before she could dive into the couch. "I bet grandma would love a hug right now."

Sakura grinned and squirmed away from Kosuke to run into the kitchen. "Gramma!"

Kosuke shook his head and gave Daisuke a look. "You know she'll blame me for that."

Daisuke grinned and sipped his tea. "How was Hawaii?"

"It was great." Kosuke smiled, rubbing at a partly dried smear of paint on his arm. "Until your mother found what she swore was an artifact."

"How long before that happened?"

Kosuke snorted and shook his head. "She found it in the airport."

Emiko poked her head in from the kitchen. "Oh, don't listen to him, Dai-chan, he's just mad he wasn't as good at surfing as he used to be."

"I surf just fine."

She smiled sweetly and disappeared back into the kitchen. "Dinner's ready."

Daisuke shared a look with his father and chuckled. They settled around the table to eat, Kosuke taking Daiki's old place. His passing had been hard on all of them, and he suspected it was one of the reasons Kosuke and Emiko traveled more lately. He wondered if they'd travel more if they didn't always come back with more artifacts than souvenirs. He almost felt sorry for his father.

Dinner consisted of spaghetti and breadsticks, stories and laughter. Daisuke found it near impossible to focus on the conversation, his meeting with Satoshi replaying itself in the back of his mind. It hadn't been satisfying in the least – pointless words, really. Meaningless and far too short. If only they'd had more time. He cursed Satoshi for that, knowing he'd planned it accordingly. Even as little as they knew of each other – or rather how little he knew of Satoshi's current life – Satoshi still knew him too well. They still knew each other too well. They may have both grown, matured, carved out their lives with what was left to them, but everyone had a simple, basic nature.

Satoshi's was to command.

It was that alone that made him push for the holiday meeting, and that alone that made him wonder if Satoshi would show. Satoshi had kept track of him over the years yet never made an effort to reestablish contact. That little fact hurt more than anything else. Not showing for the wedding he could almost understand, could almost forgive, but ten years of chosen silence?

A hand on his arm pulled him back and he glanced at Riku with a smile of apology, reaching up to squeeze her fingers. "So you brought the artifact back?" he asked dryly, glancing to his parents.

"Of course, Dai-chan! It needed sealed and to be stored properly," Emiko replied, giving him a look like he'd grown a second head in the few weeks since they'd seen each other.

Of course it had, he thought bitterly. The slowly yet ever-growing museum in their basement was depressing really. All that art, meant to be shared with the world, locked away in darkness. His fingers moved to Dark's feather, comfort and guilt clashing inside him.

Emiko cleared the dishes with Riku's help and replaced them with peach cobbler and ice cream, which Sakura went crazy over.

"So are you going back to Hawaii soon? Maybe actually see the beaches?" Daisuke asked with a grin.

"I think Ireland is next," Kosuke said, a resigned tone to his voice.

Daisuke nearly choked. "Ireland?"

Emiko beamed. "Yes! It sounds so romantic. Oh, I can't wait!"

Daisuke looked to his father and would have laughed if he didn't know his mother so well. "But... isn't there a lot of local folklore and artifacts there?"

"Oh Dai-chan, don't be so pessimistic. Irish magic has existed for so long, I wouldn't dream of trying to seal it." She sipped her coffee, oblivious to the silence that fell. When she finally noticed, she looked between Daisuke and Kosuke with a raised eyebrow. "What?"

"Really?"

"Of course. Besides, even if I wanted to, I doubt we could. Their rituals are too different. At least with the Hikari art, we know how it was made and how to seal it."

Kosuke laughed softly and poked at his dessert. "If I'd known that, I'd have suggested it before. Ireland is an enchanting place."

Dessert quickly degenerated into significant looks that Daisuke was far too eager to escape. He loved his parents dearly, but being around when they were feeling... frisky was not his idea of a good time. Thankfully, Riku was of a like mind. Usually they spent the night, but it was still early enough they headed home after gathering their things.

They said their goodnights and Daisuke stole a kiss from Riku by the cars. "See you at home."

"Drive safe," she said and winked.

It made his blood run hot the same way it had in college and he knew he was grinning like an idiot as one word ran through his head. _Sex! _He climbed into his car and followed Riku back home, the thirty minute drive seeming to take twice as long. Satoshi was the last thing on his mind when presented with the chance of sex, though there was that one tiny part of him that remembered those few moments locked in the art room with Satoshi. Warm fingers and lips, hands stronger than Riku's and far more intense.

He was having trouble breathing by the time he pulled into the driveway, sitting a few minutes to catch his breath. He almost felt guilty for such thoughts, but there wasn't much he could do when that memory had given him more frustration than he ever cared to admit. He gripped the steering wheel, taking a few deep breaths before trusting himself to get out. The cool night air at least helped clear his head.

Riku was just tucking Sakura in and together they read her her favorite story of the Princess Sakura trapped in the tower, with hair long enough to pull up her Prince. She was asleep within ten minutes and they left her with a smile on her face.

Daisuke still had his grin as Riku took his hand and led him to their bedroom and it didn't leave his face, even through all the fumbling and the laughing, and definitely not when they finally collapsed side by side, completely spent. Sex with Riku always felt like the first time and he wrapped his arms around her with a sigh of content. Several minutes passed in companionable silence before she broke it.

"How'd your meeting go?"

"Good." As good as could be expected anyway.

"Yeah?" She didn't sound too convinced.

"Yeah." Daisuke smiled and kissed her hair, glancing at their linked hands. "Actually I um... invited him to dinner for the holiday."

"Ah. Well I'm sure – wait, invited him here?"

Daisuke nearly winced as she pulled away with an incredulous look. "Are you mad?"

Riku sighed then groaned, rubbing at her face. "You should have asked me first."

"I know. I'm sorry; it kind of just slipped out."

She was silent a moment, finally giving him a look that made him cringe. "Are we inviting anyone else?"

"What about Risa?" She and Satoshi had seemed to get along, before he disappeared.

"She's working. Takeshi?"

"Still in Europe, and I'm not sure how well they'd get along." Daisuke sighed and shrugged. They had a few casual friends, though most of them were couples, and Satoshi had never been too social. He was sure that hadn't changed.

"So just us then? Should we get a babysitter?"

Daisuke considered for all of a heartbeat before shaking his head. "I want him to meet us as a family."

Riku smiled, running her fingers through unruly red hair before sighing again. "I don't even know what foods he likes."

Daisuke leaned in to kiss her cheek. "I'm sure whatever you make will be delicious. And there's always takeout if not." He saw the pillow coming and didn't try to stop it, watching as she put her back to him. "Riku?"

"Hate you," she said, voice muffled by the pillow.

He grinned and spooned against her from behind. "Love you, too."


	5. Chapter 5 Dreamer of Dreams

**AN: **Hey look, a decent-sized chapter. Who knew.

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**New World's Worth: Chapter Five  
Dreamer of Dreams**

A week wasn't long enough, especially not after he'd met Daisuke face to face. All the memories from those short years came surging back with a vengeance and only the fact he didn't have Krad there with that constant clawing to be free kept him somewhat sane. Somehow, he thought it'd be easier if Krad was still there. Then he'd at least have an excuse to stay far away from Daisuke, a reason not to get involved. Because he knew if Daisuke insisted on staying in contact and trying to be friends, he'd push for more. He'd push for a lot more, until Daisuke either gave in or broke. And either one was fine with him, so long as when it was all said and done, he finally had a definite answer.

So he waited, and the days went by in meetings and paperwork and conference calls, and the nights went by in quiet dinners alone. The temptation to find a redheaded companion to fill some of those nights was there, but he knew it would only leave him feeling disappointed afterward. No one could come close to satisfying him, not now.

When it finally came down to the day, he was having second thoughts. He knew if he wanted to cut Daisuke out of his life completely, he could – he had the connections, security, and enough people to do so, but Daisuke would still be an annoyance if he did. His number and address weren't listed, but Daisuke would find some way to track him down. Besides, he wanted to know. Daisuke was married, had a kid, but he had to know if there was a chance of there being anything between them. Maybe it was wrong, but… At any rate, one decent meeting would be enough. Depending on how Daisuke responded to him, he'd know if that connection was still there.

Satoshi arrived at Daisuke's home at seven and sat in the car a moment as he took in the area. The neighborhood felt the same as Daisuke's childhood home – clean, homey. The house itself was quaint, two stories and a bit narrow like the others on the street. There was a garden in front of the house, full of purple orchids and free of weeds. If he'd felt out of place at fourteen during that one visit, he felt no more out of place now. This was a neighborhood for families. He picked up the bottle of expensive plum wine he'd brought at Sonya's insistence before he could give in to the niggling instinct to leave.

He smoothed a hand over his silk shirt before knocking. He hadn't bothered changing from his business suit, but he'd ditched the jacket and tie in an effort to make it more casual.

When the door opened, he expected it to be Daisuke. He was disappointed. Riku hadn't changed too much from what he remembered. Her hair was longer, pulled back with a few wisps framing her face. A modest blue dress hugged her curves. Comely, he thought, a step above plain. It was on the tip of his tongue to call her Harada, but he caught himself. "Niwa-san." It felt strange, adding the honorific.

"Hiwatari-san," Riku said, and his name sounded as strange on her lips as hers felt on his. "Come in." She stepped back to let him in and he handed her the wine. "Oh, thank you." She smiled and closed the door behind him.

"Hiwatari-kun?" Daisuke's voice came from the kitchen and he rounded the corner a moment later, grinning as their eyes met. "You came."

Even though he'd felt it a week ago when Daisuke had hugged him – in public – he still wasn't quite prepared for the warmth that spread through him. "You thought I wouldn't?" He probably shouldn't have; this would likely be awkward at best.

"I wasn't sure."

They looked at each other in silence, until Riku cleared her throat and moved past them. "I'll put this in the fridge. It'll go well with dessert."

Satoshi followed a few steps behind until he reached Daisuke, pausing to take in the rest of the house. It mirrored the outside – quaint, tidy, with a welcoming, lived-in feel he'd never had in any of his own homes. Most of the furniture he could see looked worn – either bought used or several years ago.

Daisuke reached out and lightly squeezed Satoshi's wrist. "Thanks for coming."

Even through his shirt, Daisuke's touch sent tiny shocks of heat along his arm and he hoped he had even a percentage of the same effect on Daisuke. "Like I had a choice," he said dryly.

Riku came back from the kitchen with plates to set the table. "Dinner's almost ready. I hope you like shrimp."

"I'm allergic." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. If he thought about it, he could pinpoint the reaction to wanting to lash out at Riku, no matter how subtly. He'd known they would likely end up together when he left, but he'd never counted on having to deal with it directly. And while he wasn't really allergic, he didn't care for shrimp. It was enough he didn't feel guilty about lying. He didn't miss the shared look between them before she smiled and finished setting the table.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know. I can put together something else for you. Do you like chicken?"

"Chicken is fine, thank you."

"Honey, can you help me in the kitchen?"

He almost felt sorry for Daisuke when he sensed more than saw him wince. He knew well enough Daisuke was about to get a tongue-lashing. Daisuke moved to the kitchen like a scolded puppy and Satoshi took the opportunity to step into the living room.

The TV was on, playing some children's show on low volume. The coffee table was littered with papers, markers, and crayons and a little girl sat on her knees between it and the sofa, head bowed over a picture of a flower. Sakura. Niwa Sakura. He'd known Daisuke had a daughter, but it was a vast difference between knowing and seeing. He wanted to hate her on sheer principle of being Riku's child, but she was as much Daisuke's child if not more so. The Niwa and Hikari lines always bred true, he doubted that would change even now that the _Koku Yoku _was sealed. He knelt on the other side of the table, glancing at the several papers filled with flowers, birds, trees, and ocean. They were good. Very good. The colors may not have all been natural – he'd never seen a tree with pink in the trunk – but they showed a level of detail beyond a five-year-old's perspective. "These are very good, Sakura."

When she looked up, her tongue was poking out the side of her mouth in concentration. "Are you Daddy's friend? Hitari?"

"Hiwatari, yes."

She frowned and pushed her hair back with marker-smudged fingers. "Hiwatari," she replied, enunciating each syllable. "Don't you have a shorter name? What's your first name?"

Satoshi hesitated a moment before sighing. He couldn't hate or even dislike Sakura, not when she had Daisuke's open personality and an artist's gift. "Satoshi."

Her eyes lit up as she smiled. "Can I call you Uncle Toshi like Daddy's other friend Uncle Keshi?"

He groaned inwardly as that brought back memories of America and their need to nickname people. "If you must..." He'd tolerated it there; he could stand it for another night since he likely wouldn't be seeing Sakura again.

"Yay!" She reached for a paper beneath the others and held it out to him. "This is for you."

Satoshi took it, turning it over and around to look. He nearly threw it back at her. It was a faceless figure, but he didn't need a face to recognize it. The long gold hair and wings were more than enough, even if the wings were black. He felt sick looking at it, though he'd never seen Krad directly; he only had the impressions from their connection – Krad had avoided mirrors. Surprising, considering he'd been nearly as vain as Dark.

"You don't like it?"

Satoshi took a deep breath and set it down before meeting her disappointed look. "His wings should be white," he said quietly, thankful his voice held steady.

Sakura tilted her head with a frown, her crimson-flecked eyes taking on a faraway look. "No... they're black now." She nodded solemnly and looked at him – through him. "And you won't die, because of him."

"What?" Surely she didn't know. She couldn't know, because even if Daisuke told her stories about Dark, he wouldn't tell her about Krad.

The strange look in her eyes faded and she leaned forward, whispering conspiratorially. "Aunty Risa taught me to read the cards, but I don't need to see them to read them. But you can't tell Mommy! She'd be mad at Aunty. Promise!"

Satoshi nodded absently as he stared at her. An artist and... dare he call her a Seer? They existed, or had. He'd seen them in the Hikari diaries, but none had been recorded in the past three generations. It may have just been a child's delusion, after all, and it was true enough. He hadn't died because Daisuke had been stubborn enough to save ahim from himself.

"Dinner's ready!" Daisuke stepped into the room, scooping Sakura up when she ran over to fling herself at him. "Are you bothering Hiwatari-kun?"

"Noooo... Uncle Toshi said my pictures were good!"

Daisuke glanced at Satoshi, somehow managing to look amused and apologetic at once. "Oh yeah? Well, he would know; he's an amazing artist, too." He kissed her cheek and set her down. "Go wash your hands." He picked up a wood box from the couch as she skipped out of the room and started filling it with the markers and crayons. "She seems to have taken a liking to you."

Satoshi helped with the supplies, hesitating as he reached for the picture of Krad.

Daisuke noticed and picked it up instead, studying it a moment. "Did she give you this?"

"Yes."

Daisuke smiled and set it back down. "She made one for me, too."

Satoshi glanced at the picture again before gathering the others into a pile. "Of Dark?"

"Purple hair, white wings." He shrugged and closed the box. "Who can say which it is? It doesn't matter now; they're one and the same, right?"

"In theory."

Daisuke hesitated before asking, "Do you want it?"

He wanted to say no; he didn't need any reminders of Krad. He still had sleepless nights on occasion, gripped with the fear that if he slept, he'd never wake up the same. Even so... "Yes."

Daisuke's answering smile made it worth it. "Good." He set it aside, away from the others to picked up later.

Once everything was cleared away, Satoshi got to his feet. "How much have you told her?"

"Sakura? Not much. That doesn't mean my mother hasn't." Daisuke shook his head and stood. "Let's eat. What do you want to drink?"

"Water. Oolong if you have it." Satoshi followed him to the table and took a seat. Sakura climbed into the chair across from him as Riku and Daisuke returned from the kitchen with the food and drinks.

Riku smiled as she served the food. He had to grudgingly admit it looked delicious. Pasta with a rich, creamy alfredo sauce and spinach, cheese bread, and salad. "Here you go," she said, placing a plump chicken breast that smelled faintly of butter and garlic on his plate. "Sorry it's a bit plain, but it should go well with the pasta."

"It's fine, thank you," he said, the urge to apologize for the inconvenience on the tip of his tongue, but he'd been in America long enough he suppressed it almost reflexively. He wasn't used to non-formal or non-business situations where the need to apologize wasn't seen as a sign of weakness, not that he'd ever been too fond of it in the first place. He took the cup of tea from Daisuke, glancing up at him as their fingers touched, a flicker of hope igniting in him when Daisuke kept hold of it a second too long.

"So," Riku said, settling into her seat. "What kind of security do you do?"

He set his cup down and turned his attention to her. "Corporate office buildings mostly. We provide the equipment, databases, and server space to monitor and store security logs."

"I heard you're here to develop some new software?"

He hadn't mentioned that to Daisuke. It wasn't a company secret, but there'd been little news about his company here as far as he knew. "You've done your research."

"My dad was kind of keeping tabs on you," Daisuke said.

"Ah, Kosuke." He liked Kosuke, probably because he wasn't a Niwa by blood and he didn't have the prejudices of his family. And because, even if he'd only known the man a short time, Kosuke was the kind of father he would have liked to have. "How's he doing?" He was almost sorry he asked as over the next hour he learned more about Daisuke's family than he ever really cared to know. He was just glad there were no pictures. By the time they moved to dessert – a thick cheesecake with chocolate sauce – and the wine, Sakura had been sent off to get ready for bed and the conversation had changed to reminiscing over their few years in school together.

"I still can't believe you voted for me as Freedert," Daisuke said, poking at his cheesecake with a sullen look to Riku.

"Well, I couldn't be the only one not to, it's not like it would have made any difference."

"You're the only one who could have done her justice." Satoshi sat back in his chair, turning the stem of his glass between his fingers.

Daisuke glanced at him, a slight flush to his face that could have been from his two glasses of wine. "You're the one who freed her."

Satoshi shrugged. There were a lot of ways to free someone. His motives had been selfish for the most part. Sending the Wedge of Time into the painting had just made sure two potentially dangerous artifacts were sealed and wouldn't go after Daisuke again.

Riku stood and cleared away her dishes. "I'll go tuck Sakura in," she said, brushing her fingers against Daisuke's shoulder on her way past. "Good night, Hiwatari-san."

"Good night. Thank you for dinner." He watched her leave before looking to Daisuke, feeling the curious stare like a hot touch.

Daisuke smiled and refilled their glasses. "I'm glad you came..."

Satoshi nodded. "It's been interesting." He sipped his wine, watching as Daisuke nearly downed his in one go. "When did you become a wino?"

Daisuke squirmed and set his glass down. "Sorry... You make me nervous."

"You didn't seem nervous the other day."

He shook his head, turning the glass between his hands. "Not then. I just..." He trailed off, looking away.

Satoshi watched him, waiting to see if he'd continue before hazarding a guess. "Wasn't sure I'd get along with your family?"

"What? No! Well... maybe a little..." Daisuke sighed and drained the rest of his glass. "Before, I was so happy to see you I never realized... You make me feel things," he said in a rush. His eyes widened and he clamped a hand over his mouth as if he hadn't meant to say that, turning nearly as red as his hair.

Satoshi's heart skipped a beat. If he'd been waiting for any kind of sign, that would certainly be it. It was on the tip of his tongue to ask if they were good things, but the look on Daisuke's face kept him silent. Instead he sipped his wine and watched Daisuke pour himself another glass. He heard a clock ticking somewhere in the silence that followed and it was just getting annoying enough he thought he should leave when Daisuke spoke.

"Why'd you do it?"

The way the conversation had been going he thought he had some idea what "it" was, but knowing Daisuke... "Do what?"

"Why did you try to _kill _yourself? I mean, I know why, but... it seemed like you _wanted _to die."

Satoshi sighed and realized he couldn't really answer that, not anymore. It'd been easier ten years ago, when it was all fresh and he was looking at the world through the eyes of a boy. Time had a way of clouding things. The desperation he remembered all too well, it was one of the only times in his life he'd let emotion rule him. He'd had reasons and had thought them logical conclusions at the time, he was sure, but it was so hard to remember specifics. "I did, at the time," he finally said – he remembered that well enough.

"Because of Krad?"

He nodded. "You can't understand what it was like. I started hearing his voice long before I should have – like a sibilant whisper in the dark. It was an itch I couldn't scratch. Sometimes I felt like I was losing my mind. Only the knowledge of our families' histories kept me sane."

"But why was he like that? Dark wasn't anything like that."

Discussing Krad was the last thing he wanted to do, but he resigned himself to it when he noticed Daisuke's curious look. It was something he'd always wondered himself, though he'd never dared to look too hard for an answer until a few years after they'd been sealed. "The initial separation likely had something to do with it." Spells that powerful colliding with a piece of art that big left their marks in a lot of ways. "The Hikari kept very meticulous diaries. When the curse first took root, he was like any other new sentient being – curious, childlike even, but he was... damaged. I assume it was the same for Dark, in the beginning. The first few Hikaris tried to help him, to heal him, but nothing seemed to do any good. Eventually his frustration lead to anger and he began lashing out, trying to take more control." He paused and shrugged, and saw Daisuke listening with rapt fascination. "The Hikari were arrogant. They didn't take well to one of their creations acting out."

"What'd they do?"

He didn't want to answer – some of the things he'd read had made even him sick, and he'd gotten his hands on some of the bloodier cases while working with the police. "Spells of binding, to say the least. They didn't last long, which pushed them to other methods."

"Ah... I don't want to know, do I?"

"No. Krad learned his cruelty from the Hikari."

"Oh." Daisuke sighed and propped his chin up, fiddling with his glass, though he'd stopped drinking at least. "So... it wasn't really all his fault he ended up like that."

"Not entirely, I suppose."

"But you still hate him."

Satoshi blinked and looked at Daisuke. "No. I never hated him." He wanted to stop talking, but even one glass of wine loosened his tongue, and the fact it was Daisuke only compounded that. Once he started, the words kept flowing. "I hated what he did, what he wanted to do, but I never hated him. I understood him, more than I ever wanted to." Krad had been as lonely as he was, had even tried to use that against him, but he'd been born with more integrity than past Hikari hosts. "Even so, I didn't agree with him and I didn't know how else to stop him. I'd planned to go out a hero, in my own way," he said with a wry twist of his lips. "All because of you."

Daisuke's surprise was amusing to behold, his expression close to when he'd admitted to feeling things. "Me?" He tilted his head and smiled, and Satoshi prayed Daisuke'd had enough alcohol he wouldn't remember much of this conversation come morning. "I did always wonder if I was your trigger," he said softly. "You did it for me?"

Satoshi shrugged, unable to explain how truly selfish most of his actions had been. Daisuke was far too giving to understand. "You'd do the same for Riku or Sakura."

Daisuke nodded slowly, swishing his wine around before draining the little bit left. "Would you do it again?"

Satoshi didn't hesitate. "In a heartbeat."

He looked startled a moment before smiling again. "I think I need to lie down now..."

"I should get going." Satoshi set aside his mostly untouched wine and stood, thankful he'd barely consumed a full glass.

"You shouldn't be driving." Daisuke swayed as he stood, frowning as he tried to grab hold of Satoshi.

Satoshi shifted, catching Daisuke before he could fall on his face. "I'm fine. I'm more worried about you getting safely to bed." It took a few tries to get Daisuke steady enough to trust letting him go, watching as he stumbled towards the hall.

When he reached it, Daisuke turned and leaned against the wall. "Are you going to disappear again?"

He should say yes. He knew he was capable of screwing up Daisuke's life without trying. The fact he knew he'd be unable to keep from trying... "No."

The fearful hope on Daisuke's face turned to relief. "Good... Good. Goodnight, Hiwatari-kun." The slight slurring of his name was almost endearing.

"Goodnight, Niwa." He stepped past Daisuke, wanting to touch his shoulder like Riku had. He refrained. By the time he reached his car, he knew he'd be inviting Daisuke to the art exhibit the following afternoon.


End file.
